What does it mean to fledge? When a baby Carolina Wren leaves the nest but isn't quite ready to leave on their own the parents will stay nearby calling (enticing) them out of the nest.
When the Blue Winged Warbler's babies leave the nest the parents hear their calls and come and care for them in the under brush because they are not yet capable of flying.
Once when a Ruby Throated Hummingbird got it's beak stuck in the trim of Beth's garage, her son gently cupped his hands around it, pulled it free, walked over to the garage doors and opened his hands. The bird sat stunned for a minute and then suddenly flew away.
What is masterly inactivity? It is not: Laissez aller (what's the use?) attitude or indolence. "It is the 'wise passiveness' which 'indicates the power to act, the desire to act, and the insight and self-restraint which forbid action'." (Vol 3, pg.29) It's elements include:
1. Authority: The MASTER in masterly inactivity notes that you are the authority. This authority should be neither harsh not indulgent. We should be "easily entreated in things immaterial but immovable in matters of real importance- these are a fixed principle". We should be willing to admit when we are wrong graciously. God is the backbone of our positition. I should ask myself daily "Who gave me this authority?"
2. Good nature or good humor: A frank, cordial, natural good humor, but not the same as permissive. Take time to consider your answer. Don't be hopeless, "do what ever you want, you're going to do it anyway", instead, "Let me think about it".
3. Self-confidence: Parents should trust themselves. Fussy, commanding, constraining over much muddies the relationship (like over painting in watercolors). My confidence doesn't come from myself, it comes from God's Love. He is my guide, my hope, my only confidence.
Ps 139:1-5
Oh Lord, you have searched me and know me.
You know when I sit down and when I rise up;
You understand my thought from afar.
You scrutinize my path and my lying down,
and are intimately acquainted with all my ways.
Even before there is a word on my tongue ,
Behold, O Lord, You know it all.
You have enclosed me behind and before,
And laid your hand upon me....
4. Confidence in the children: How should I respond when they do wrong? Belittle? Put them "in their place"? I should try to understand them!!!!! Teach them "They can, they ought, they should".
5. Leisure: SLOW DOWN and GET A LIFE! Beth's family has what they call "porch time". They gather regularly on the back porch to chat, do handicrafts, play games...just hang out.
6. Serenity: Get a life! Charlotte Mason said, "Mother's are often too much with their children." Vol. 1) Mother's should have hobbies, have interests! They should also attempt to educate themselves about their children's interests that are outside of their experience.
7. Faith: Let GOD do HIS work. Beth told a beautiful story about one of her children who struggled with a huge change in their lives and how she had explained the decision, but then had to sit back and let God work in her child's life to bring understanding and acceptance. (I was weeping by this point, having gone through something similar with one of mine recently. We did try to explain, but understanding did not come, only anger and arguement. The next step, I realized should have been to trust God to work in the child's life. As it was I fretted for sometime! Once again, as the Lord has tried to tell me time and time again---Phil 4:4-6!!! Give it all to him and he will guard my heart and mind in Christ Jesus!! Will I ever get it??) She finished by telling how the Lord had used the hardship to draw her child closer to Himself!!
Beth continued into Areas of Application!
1. Play: Even in the high school years we need to encourage lots of play. Family game times and even having families over with younger children are ways we can encourage this.
2. Work: Encourage them in areas of interest to them. I thought of a project mine wanted to do on Composers. (I went straight and bought the book she had asked for ;-)
3. Standing or falling: They must learn to stand or fall by their own efforts. They must learn self-will. (This is a theme of Charlotte Mason's that is screaming loud and clear to me right now!)
4. Friendships: Beth believes they should be allowed to choose their own friends.
5. Money: They should have their own accounts and learn to handle their own money.
6. Opinions: They should be allowed to have their own opinions and we should understand they won't always share ours. We shouldn't force our opinions of other people on them.
In conclusion, Beth asked if we wanted to be a mainspring or a lever in the lives of our children...A mainspring is the coil that winds a watch. When wound, it lets go slowly as it turns. A lever digs up the rock and hurls it in one swift motion.
I want to be a mainspring!!!!!
I told Beth thanks for doing this. It was exactly the balanced, grace filled message I needed right now in my relationship with my older children! God's timing is always perfect.
5. Leisure: SLOW DOWN and GET A LIFE! Beth's family has what they call "porch time". They gather regularly on the back porch to chat, do handicrafts, play games...just hang out.
6. Serenity: Get a life! Charlotte Mason said, "Mother's are often too much with their children." Vol. 1) Mother's should have hobbies, have interests! They should also attempt to educate themselves about their children's interests that are outside of their experience.
7. Faith: Let GOD do HIS work. Beth told a beautiful story about one of her children who struggled with a huge change in their lives and how she had explained the decision, but then had to sit back and let God work in her child's life to bring understanding and acceptance. (I was weeping by this point, having gone through something similar with one of mine recently. We did try to explain, but understanding did not come, only anger and arguement. The next step, I realized should have been to trust God to work in the child's life. As it was I fretted for sometime! Once again, as the Lord has tried to tell me time and time again---Phil 4:4-6!!! Give it all to him and he will guard my heart and mind in Christ Jesus!! Will I ever get it??) She finished by telling how the Lord had used the hardship to draw her child closer to Himself!!
Beth continued into Areas of Application!
1. Play: Even in the high school years we need to encourage lots of play. Family game times and even having families over with younger children are ways we can encourage this.
2. Work: Encourage them in areas of interest to them. I thought of a project mine wanted to do on Composers. (I went straight and bought the book she had asked for ;-)
3. Standing or falling: They must learn to stand or fall by their own efforts. They must learn self-will. (This is a theme of Charlotte Mason's that is screaming loud and clear to me right now!)
4. Friendships: Beth believes they should be allowed to choose their own friends.
5. Money: They should have their own accounts and learn to handle their own money.
6. Opinions: They should be allowed to have their own opinions and we should understand they won't always share ours. We shouldn't force our opinions of other people on them.
In conclusion, Beth asked if we wanted to be a mainspring or a lever in the lives of our children...A mainspring is the coil that winds a watch. When wound, it lets go slowly as it turns. A lever digs up the rock and hurls it in one swift motion.
I want to be a mainspring!!!!!
I told Beth thanks for doing this. It was exactly the balanced, grace filled message I needed right now in my relationship with my older children! God's timing is always perfect.
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